Love is a many-splendored thing. If you've found love, you want everyone else to find it too.

Love: Wishing To All In It Shortly?

You see it in the movie and on t.v. and in our favorite songs. It's the "ideal" we all aspire to in our personal lives. It's love. Everyone wants it and everyone needs it (even if they say they don't). But in this day and age, it's oh-so hard to find it.

Being Single vs. Being "Coupled"

You say it won't happen to you, but it does. Your single, then one of your single friends becomes half of a couple. Then it seems like every group outing includes "the boyfriend." And when it doesn't, all she talks about is who she can set you up with. It's almost as if she's saying, "You're no longer good enough by yourself." Once you feel like you're being treated like a second-class citizen just because you haven't found "the loveof your life,"you vow that if you ever do find it, you won't treat your friends like that. But then WHAMMO! You find love.

Then you go out with your single friends, and although you rarely (if ever) bring the new man in your life along, you still find yourself fighting the urge not to mention who you could set your friends up with. Eventually, the temptation is too overwhelming, and you turn into "that friend." You've met a lot of his friends who are, by definition, "great catches" and who you would love to fix up with one of your single friends who's an equally great catch. Surely they will fall in love, you will marry your guy and your the friends you set up will marry, and you'll have New Year's Eve parties at each other's houses for the rest of your lives. (Okay, maybe that's a lofty goal. After all, New Year's Eve.....that's quite a commitment.)

love 1

While this all sounds well and good, things generally don't work out that way. It seems like when you try to fix friends up, it just doesn't work. The best thing to do is to have big group outings and let your friends find love with each other that way. Or not. But leave it up to them. Even if you do fix someone up and it seems to be working out, it doesn't always work out that way. So don't pressure them. Be very hands-off.

Treat them the way you'd want to be treated, and whatever you do, try not to make them feel like second-class citizens just because they're single. And don't let them treat you differently because you're no longer single either. Call them on any "different" treatment. Fixing someone up doesn't mean you're "fixing" them--there's nothing wrong with them and you don't want them to feel that way. Just do whatever make them happy.

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